


we're slowly dancing (in a burning room)

by tunastork (mariexa)



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, M/M, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Sacrifice, Soul Stone, Vormir, it's sad hours time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-04-23
Packaged: 2020-01-25 14:31:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18576412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariexa/pseuds/tunastork
Summary: The space stone leads them to Vormir.Just the two of them. Together. It feels like a distant promise. It feels like fate.Steve never believed in no win scenarios.





	we're slowly dancing (in a burning room)

**Author's Note:**

> look I'm posting this now because I don't want to be boo boo the fool when endgame comes out.
> 
> title from the song of the same name. 
> 
> I don't own anything.

 

It’s very quiet.

 

If Tony were asked what unsettles him about retiree life, his answer is the silence.

 

If he were asked if he’d ever see himself living in a cabin in the woods in the middle of fucking nowhere he’d say _not in a million years,_ after laughing his ass off of course.

 

Yet here he is, years living in a dusty old cabin in the middle of--well he barely recalls if they’re still in America--let alone what state.

 

He’s a city rat, born in a city, raised in it too. He’s missing the constant hum, the hustle and bustle. It wasn’t even this quiet in Malibu. Hell he has no idea where the nearest market or town is. No neighbors, no one comes knocking at their door. No phone calls, no signals, some days he thinks he can’t even hear the birds sing.

 

Peace and quiet, too quiet. Unsettling.

 

But he’s never been happier.

 

Because Steve is here, whole, hearty, _alive._ Here with him. _Safe._

 

Steve is here to say _good morning_ every single damn day. Steve is here to hold his hand as they watch the sunset on their porch and keeping each other warm. Steve is here when Tony gets massive headaches that renders him immobile for the better part of the day, he’d rub Tony’s temples til it’s better and gently kiss his forehead after. And when it’s gone, he’d dance with Tony. Their steps in time to Sinatra’s dulcet tones, he’d make Tony laugh when Steve steps on his toes and promptly turns bright red to his ears.

 

He is here to laugh when Tony burns the souffle he’s making. He laughs as long as the smell of burning pastry still wafts around their home.

 

He’s here when Tony asks, “Where’d you get the milk?”

 

And his face closes off, and he’s jaw clenches like it used to before, “Somewhere,” that’s all he says.

 

Tony would hum in reply, “Maybe we shouldn’t have stayed so far away.” And his face closes off more.

 

Steve won’t talk to him or look him in the eye for a day or two, and Tony hates that, but at least Steve is here.

 

Then Steve would be beside him in the morning when Tony wakes up, his own version of an apology. Left hand laying over Tony’s heart, never failing to wake Tony by how heavy it is.

 

Steve’s left hand shake most days.

 

-

 

They were happy until they weren’t.

 

They were happy until Tony remembers.

 

Vormir. Skull. Sacrifice.

 

_“It has to be you.”_

 

Steve breaking.

 

_“We agreed.”_

 

Steve with the gauntlet in his left hand like a burden, burning like a brand, heavy as a promise. The good soldier, the paragon of virtue, is thrashing around, angry, frantic, eyes mad with desperation. _No! No! There has to be another way! There has to be! I refuse!_ Skull shakes his head and leaves them to their farewells. Tony watches, stoic and silent, a contrast to Steve’s wailing.

 

It’s just the two of them. ‘ _Together’_ like they had both said. This feels like a distant promise. This feels like fate.

 

Steve is screaming to the top of his lungs.

 

_“So you still love me huh?”_ Tony tries

 

Steve growls, hiding is face in his massive hands. “ _Not now Tony. I can’t do this to you not after--”_

 

In Steve’s cries he hears all his missed chances, all the lost time. All the people he loved, and he lost. And Tony is going to be one of those people, and Tony understands completely.

 

If the roles were reversed, Tony would have burnt this planet to the ground, universe be damned. An exaggeration maybe, but once upon a time, for Steve he would. But he is not Steve, and Steve is not him. Steve is not selfish. Not for Tony, never for Tony. Or so he thought.

 

You could only lose so much before you break, even super soldiers.

 

Maybe they deserved this, maybe this is where Steve resumes what he left off in Siberia, maybe this is their penance.

 

The alien sky rumbles.

 

Steve closes his left fist.

 

-

Steve enters their small home, fresh firewood gathered in his strong arms.

 

Steve snakes his left arm around Tony’s waist, kisses his temple and buries his face in Tony’s hair. Tony knows and understands the rhyme and reason behind Steve’s behavior. He understands desperation like the back of his hand.

 

Steve, ever uncompromising. There are no no-win scenarios, even at the worst cost. Tony should know.

 

But maybe, for once in his life, Steve chose to be selfish. _For little old me?_ Tony couldn’t wrap his head around it even if he has years  _(has it really been years?)_ of proof and more. Even so, the universe doesn’t deserve this. Not for Tony.

 

Tony grasps Steve’s hand on his waist. Breathes in the scent of the room, the scent of burning firewood, the scent of _home,_ of Steve. He takes the feeling of being in Steve’s arms, _safe, content,_ and commits it to memory.

 

“Good morning,” Steve’s breath warms his cheeks.

 

Then Steve’s left hand shakes.

 

Tony shakes and trembles under the weight of Steve’s love.

 

This is where Tony would have replied, _good morning, beloved._ Like he always does, turns around and kiss Steve on the lips. But not today. They are out of time.

 

Tony turns around and instead asks,

 

“Dance with me?”

 

He cups Steve’s face in his palms and rubs his cheeks with his thumbs. He needs to be gentle, he at least owes Steve this tenderness. His hands fall on Steve’s broad shoulders, strong even after carrying all the weight the world has laid onto it.  

 

One look. Steve takes one look in his eyes. That’s all it takes always, for them, and Tony knows that Steve knows. That Steve finally has to let go.

 

Steve’s hands tighten around his waist. His breaths quicken. He trembles. Tony quells it all with a hand in his cheek and the tenderest kiss on his lips. They sway.

 

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart” Tony wants to say, “If only we could stay this way forever,”

 

Steve lets out a heavy breath, closes his eyes, and lays his head on Tony’s shoulder. The burden he carries is more visible than ever. Steve’s left hand shakes again, and in the tiniest voice barely uttered into existence Steve whispers, “We could,”

 

It wouldn’t be fair _,_ Tony thinks, _not to those who are gone, and not to us._ They both know this.

 

But there are no songs, there are no more words, just their hearts beating in sync and it was enough.

 

Steve straightens up. He stares at Tony, committing him to memory. Tony takes his left hand, places a gentle kiss on his palm, and puts it over his heart. Steve lets out a broken whimper. He grasps at the cloth on Tony’s chest.

 

“It’s time, Steve, you have to let me go”

 

Red grows in the corner of his vision and the illusion fades around them.

 

They’re in Vormir, like they never left. And Tony is standing on the edge. Right where he had led Steve.

 

Steve won’t look him in the eye, and all Tony could do is look.  

 

“Be safe. Win.”

 

Left gauntleted hand on Tony’s heart, Steve pushes.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah.
> 
> heavily inspired from shaliara's comic [ here ](https://shaliara.tumblr.com/post/173842939649/what-if-they-had-the-gauntlet-back-and-gather-the) I've been procrastinating this fic since last year when this comic came out and endgame lit a fire up my ass.
> 
> don't forget to leave a comment!


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